Genius!

Poppy is in the midst of a terrible two situation that doesn’t seem to have any end in site:

Every time I see this face, I know something is broken or injured.  Or about to be.

Every time I see this face, I know something is broken or injured. Or about to be.



Will didn’t do a “terrible two” thing; at least not that I can recall.  Sure, he was moody, and defiant at times, but nothing is seared into my brain that is remotely similar to Poppy’s epic shenanigans/meltdowns.

Unfortunately for all of us, I am not the most patient or calm person to begin with, and on more than one occasion I have found myself locked in an insane battle of wills with someone who didn’t even exist 36 months ago.

I try so hard to keep my cool, but I seriously feel like a kettle about to explode.  And that feels both unmotherly and just insane.

But yesterday I stumbled across a solution: pig tails!  It is virtually impossible to stay frustrated at Penelope when she looks like this:

Phase 1: Look at how beautifully angelic she is.

Phase 1: The Angelic Stare

Especially when that turns to this:

Phase 2: She has noticed the camera.  She knows this means I am feeling like a softy towards her.

Phase 2: The Strategic Smooch.  She has noticed the camera. She knows this means I am feeling like a softy towards her, so she throws in a kiss for good measure.

And even when that slowly starts morphing into this:

Phase 3: She knows I am both distracted by her cutie wootieness and feeling warm fuzzies towards her.  Which gives her a brilliant plan (thus the evil cackle face).

Phase 3: Hatching the Plot.  She knows I am distracted by the camera and her cutie wootieness and feeling warm fuzzies towards her. Which gives her a brilliant plan (thus the evil cackle face).

and leads somewhere like this:

Phase 3: the mad dash to the dining room, to take advantage of the temporary parental weakness.

Phase 4: Go Time.

and inevitably culminates in this:

Phase 5: Attempt to Scale the Unsecured Bookcase, Just For the Hell of It.

Phase 5: Attempt to Scale the Unsecured Bookcase, Just For the Hell of It.

Typically, my response to this would then be: “Penelope, why are you doing this?  Can’t you please just not be wild for like 2 minutes?  NO. NO!  I canNOT take the whining.  You are being ridiculous, and the whining is making my brain melt.  I will not let you climb the bookcase!  William isn’t climbing the bookcase!  Mommy isn’t climbing the bookcase.  Have you ever seen anyone climb a bookcase?  No. GET AWAY FROM THE BOOKCASE!  PLEASE!  DAMMIT!!!!”

But this time I was able to look at her little face and realize that, in fact, there actually was no reason why she was doing that, and no, she can’t stop with the wild, and yes, she is being ridiculous.  But that is because SHE IS TWO.  Or, essentially, a borderline insane person with no control over her emotions or her hairstyle.

And the only thing more insane than someone in pigtails is someone trying to reason with someone in pigtails.  So instead of the crazy pointless fight, I distracted her with a trip to the kitchen for some juice and she showed me how she can cross her eyes:

Phase 6: Tantrum Face.  The end.

Phase 6: The end.

Total mom win.

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